Always a Bridesmaid never a Bride!

I just had the opportunity to experience “Bridesmaids” the movie!  I have not laughed….cried….and almost peed in my pants all at once, in a very long time.  I will indefinitely say this is the most screamingly entertaining movie I have ever seen!!!  I have never felt such a community of uncontrollable hysteria in a theatre before.   From the beginning to the end, I had to cover my mouth from embarrassing Michael with my over the top laugh…almost choking on my nachos..or spitting my soda out …I couldn’t control myself! I don’t know if it is because I can relate to being in a wedding (as I have been in about 500) or the hilarity of relationships between women.  Kristen Wiig is an absolute genius both as a writer and an actress.  Wiig and Annie Mumolo nailed every emotion, behavior, and schizophrenia that overcomes women when a wedding is in the works!!  Thank you to the both of them as this movie serves as a revolution for funny women in Hollywood!!!

If you have ever been a part of a wedding, you will see yourself in each one of these characters and have felt these ridiculous emotions at one point.  Whether anyone wants to admit it….you have felt insecurities, jealousy, sadness, happiness, joy, excitement, or complete indifference toward the entire process….and you know what??? IT’s OK!!!!!!  I have been a maid of honor about 100 times, which is just another word for the bride’s slave.  Hahahahhahah! Only kidding….Kind of! As I speak about weddings, the one that sticks out in my mind is my sister’s.  Bridezilla is an understatement…she wasn’t as much screaming at people as she was crying.  Every trip ended in tears, by either her or my dad (depending on how many times he had to pull his wallet out).  My sister would cry….my mom would be off smoooking (my mom’s English/New York/Boston accent)….my dad would be shaking his head looking at all of the bills…..I would be sitting self indulgently laughing….and my poor brother in law would be looking to me for support.  I would just give him that “hey welcome to the family” look with a sly wink!!! I have to admit I enjoyed every minute of it.  If you have ever met my family you would completely understand.  They’re hysterical!!!  Bravo eat your heart out! The real housewives of Covina coming soon!

Why does this ceremony throw women into a frenzy??!!  It brings out feelings that some women didn’t even know they possess.  There is a part in the movie where one of the bridesmaids says, “are you F&^%ing kidding me?” and stabs one of the decorations!!! BRILLIANT! I’ve seen so many girls completely lose it and when I saw this, I lost it!!!!!! We as a gender are a little on the crazy side, we have to admit girls!!! It’s ok….if we weren’t this way men would be completely bored out of their mind! In the magazine Glamour there is a section called “Hey, it’s ok if……” ….well here is my wedding version!

Hey it’s ok if you……..

1.        As a bridesmaid…you order a dress two sizes too small to give yourself motivation and the day of the wedding the dress completely rips off of you right before pictures! (I won’t mention any names!)

2.       You secretly want to rip the bride’s face off because she has the perfect life and you’re still living with your parents!

3.       Get obliterated at your friend’s bachelorette party and throw up on the machines in the casino…get wheeled out…and get us all kicked out

4.       You get wasted at your friend’s bachelorette party….we lose you…and find you hanging upside down on the gogo cage like monkey bars.

5.       If you pull out your breast and spray the bar with breast milk!

6.       If you stop the entire club by doing push ups and squats on the gogo box and have everyone screaming 1…2….3…..4…..5!!!!!!!!!!

7.       If you ask for a Latin one and got a Black one and he says he’s Dominican!

8.       IF you light your sister’s “binky” on fire during your speech..Hey she’s married now!

9.       If you sing Baby got back on stage in your Bridesmaid’s dress

10.   And finally….It’s perfectly ok with being happy for her when you are completely content with your life and can’t wait for what the future holds

 Thank you to everyone who was involved with that movie!!! Thank you for showing women how ridiculous we can act sometimes and in the end it’s all ok.  Many blessings to those who have served in all of your friend’s weddings, it will just make yours that much more amazing!!!!!!!!!!!